The stealthy hand of discouragement put a chokehold on me and dragged me into the quicksand of depression. I was sinking fast. Beside myself, I wrestled, which only pulled me down further. Finally, as I let go of my wanting-to-fix-this-myself attitude, I cried and poured out my heart to God.
“Please, God, please don’t let me sink into depression again. What’s wrong? Why am I so downhearted when I have so many blessings? I see them, and I’m so grateful. I don’t understand this, Lord. This discouragement takes hold of me and won’t let me go. Please, God, please, help me to rest in You. Help, God, help… I’m sinking…”
I’ve been struggling with learning to embrace instead of fight against my chronic illness, but when I get achy and worn out or I get sick again, courage and comfort drain away sometimes. My mind weakly tries to grasp the promises, but my heart won’t always let them in.
I don’t always want to talk or write about this, because I don’t want to sound like a whiner. But the reality is there. Not only for me, but also for you.
You may not have a chronic illness, but there are so many other losses, burdens, or heartaches we all deal with every day in one way or another. And they are, oh, so real. Maybe you have tried, like me, to tell yourself, “There are those who have it worse than me, so I shouldn’t complain.” But that doesn’t help us deal with and grieve our own losses. Acknowledging and grieving our own pain helps us to cope better in life.
No matter what your trial is, I’m so sorry you have to go through it. It is real and it hurts really bad. And no matter what anyone says, whether it’s others’ or your own criticizing voice, you can’t live fully and freely with it unless you acknowledge how much it hurts you and you grieve over its presence in your life.
That day when I was sinking down, the relief did not come right away, but God was gracious and He heard my cry. These words seeped as a soothing balm into my troubled heart, and I hope they will in yours as well:
“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
and do not be afraid.”
John 14:27
He promises HIS PEACE. Not will give, but He says “I give.” Right now, this moment. And His peace can take away the trouble and fear in our hearts.
I knew this verse was in John 14, so I read that chapter. It’s amazing. Jesus is preparing a room for us in His Father’s house, a better place for us hereafter. The pain we feel now is nothing compared to the joy He is preparing for us.
Sometimes my heart is so homesick for Him, to be with Him forever where nothing will hinder us from praising Him fully and completely. Won’t that be a glorious day?
Then one of the twenty-four elders asked me, “Who are these who are clothed in white? Where did they come from?”
And I said to him, “Sir, you are the one who knows.”
Then he said to me, “These are the ones who died in the great tribulation. They have washed their robes in the blood of the Lamb and made them white.
That is why they stand in front of God’s throne
and serve Him day and night in His Temple.
And He who sits on the throne
will give them shelter.
They will never again be hungry or thirsty;
they will never be scorched by the heat of the sun.
For the Lamb on the throne
will be their Shepherd.
He will lead them to springs of life-giving water.
And God will wipe every tear from their eyes.”Revelations 7:13-17
Praying For His peace in your hearts and in your lives!
Freed to Fly 
This one hit straight to my heart, as if God were speaking to me directly. So timely for me. Thank you Trudy for putting into words what I am feeling but unable to express. I needed the reminder of Psalm 73:26. I too am learning to live with chronic illness, disabilities, pain and depression. I too have blessings surrounding me but sink and rise, sink and rise. Thank you for your words that let me know I am not alone…both in this world and with the blessing of God’s presence. Peace going forward.
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I am so happy you feel less alone, Susan. I’m sorry you have to deal with so much. I identify with the sink and rise. It’s a daily struggle sometimes to keep focused on God’s promises, isn’t it? Praying for God’s peace to fill your heart and surround you like a warm security blanket! Hugs! ❤️
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Thanks Trudy. I copied this blog post and will refer to it often. God bless.
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You’re welcome, Susan. Thank you for encouraging my heart today.
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Trudy, I stand on John 14:27 so often. I particularly love it in the Amplified Bible. I’m so glad to be here from Holley’s today. God bless you and lift you out of the pit, friend. (Psalm 40)
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Thank you so much, Elizabeth, for your kind thoughts, for bringing Scriptures to my attention, and for blessing me today. I love that version and I love Psalm 40. Yes, He truly lifts us out of the pit! God bless you, too! Thanks for stopping by. 💗
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Trudy, thank you so much for sharing your experience of how you came closer to God through your trials. I am so grateful for people who are doing their best to follow Christ even through the tough times. I have definitely had similar experiences of finding Heavenly Father there for me when I need Him the most. Like you said we sometimes are homesick for our heavenly home, but I know that because of the Savior’s sacrifice He will always be there with His peace and that can get us through anything. I love this short video that talks about how through our struggles we learn to have Christ like attributes and fulfill part of our purpose for being here on this earth. It is so comforting to me! I would love to hear your thoughts when you get a chance to watch it. Thank you again for sharing your experience!
http://www.reallifeanswers.org/challenges-in-life/how-do-challenges-bring-us-closer-to-god
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Thank you so much for your kind words, Lindsey. Yes, the Savior will get us through anything! I love the video. It touched me deeply and brought me such comfort. It is one I will have to return to some days. I usually add new links to my Pages towards the end of every month, and I hope to add this one to Hope Harbor. It surely does provide hope! Thank you again, Lindsey, and God bless you! ❤️
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I am so glad that I was able to help you in some way! (: And I would be happy to know that others will be comforted by it too as you share it, thank you! Trudy I would love to discuss more about faith and especially the process of how you are able to come out of things so strong. Would you be interested? If you have facebook I would love it if you would friend me so we can talk, this is my link: https://www.facebook.com/lindsey.zea.3
I can’t wait to hear back from you! Have a wonderful day (:
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Oh, Lindsey, it doesn’t always feel like I come out of things so strong. But I’m grateful for a God Who is so faithful and patient with my distrusting heart. I no longer use Facebook except for an abuse support group that only works through it. But you are welcome to email me anytime, ok? You can access it on the right hand side of my website – the envelope where it says “Your Thoughts Count!” You have a wonderful day, too! 🙂
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Okay! I would love to email you. I tried the icon with the envelope, but it didn’t go through for me… my email address is lindseyzeambm@gmail.com. Either you can email me first or I can just wait until you respond with your email address. Thanks! (:
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Sorry if you get this twice, the first time I responded doesn’t seem to be showing up at the moment! I tried what you said, clicking “your thoughts count” but it didn’t go through. My email address is lindseyzeambm@gmail.com if you want to email me first, or I can just wait for you to respond with your email (: Have a blessed day!
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I’m sorry the email didn’t go through, Lindsey. The first time you commented, I hadn’t approved it yet. I will email you. 🙂
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Thank you for being vulnerable to share your struggles & gracious to share how God meets you where you are. I pray for your strength & health & thank God for leading me here to be encouraged! Blessings!
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Thank you so much for your kind encouragement and prayers, Renee. I’m so happy you were encouraged! Blessings to you, too! 💗
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Hi Trudy! I am so sorry that you have to go through this. It is really hard, I have had my own struggles with anxiety and depression too. It’s such a helpless feeling. But you really found your strength in God, where all strength comes.
Be sure to take care of yourself too my friend. God has things he wants you to do for him, like encourage all of us.
Bless you always,
Ceil
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Thank you for your encouragement and comfort, Ceil. Some days I wonder what my purpose in life is if I often have to stay homebound, but it encourages my heart to know my posts do encourage. Then I am reminded my purpose is to encourage and bring hope and healing to hurting souls, and if I wouldn’t have this chronic illness, I maybe wouldn’t be home writing.
I’m so sorry you have had struggles with anxiety and depression, Ceil. Yes, it is such a helpless feeling. Praying for God to give you strength and hope in Him! ❤️
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Trudy, my heart goes out to you. Isn’t it so often the case that we are attacked in this way when we feel we should be moving beyond such feelings or simply resting happily in our many blessings? Yet it is easy to get discouraged when we’re continually fatigued and in pain. I am affected that way too. And it’s a constant battle to see the glimmers of grace amidst the detritus of abuse and pain, emotional or otherwise.
These are perceptive words:”you can’t live fully and freely with it unless you acknowledge how much it hurts you and you grieve over its presence in your life.” Amen, my friend! Acknowledgement and grieving are a necessary part of the recovery process of living free despite our health and other challenges.
in sharing your personal struggles so openly you are helping others to be set free and feel less alone with their own trials and tribulations. Thank you for being brave enough to share. I love you for it! 🙂 ❤
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Thank you so much for your kind understanding and encouragement, Joy. You understand me so well since you go through the same personal struggles. Each week I beg God to give me the words to write and so often He tells me to just be “real” and write what comes into my heart. It’s not easy though. I love you, too, Joy! Praying for more of those “glimmers of grace” for both of us and everyone who stops in here!❤️
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Trudy,
This is so true and good…when we simply tell God where we’re at and call out to Him…He comforts us and He never condemns us for our struggles or compares them to another person’s struggle…I’m always having to remind myself of this truth…praying His peace upon you 🙂
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Dolly, you have blessed me today in reminding me God never condemns us for our struggles or compares them. Thank you. I need that reminder, too, as I forget so easily. Praying His peace upon you, too! ❤️
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It really is in the moment, when we ask for it. Not tomorrow, but at our need. I needed this today, as I let things get to me. Thank you!
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I’m so glad this helped you today, Sarah. It’s so easy to let things get to us, isn’t it? May His peace fill your heart to overflowing! 💗
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