“Therefore, as God’s chosen people,
holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with
compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”
Colossians 3:12
Everyone needs compassion. Everyone longs for kindness and caring. For someone who is willing to help. They need someone who will see behind their masks or dismissing words. They need someone to validate that their pain is real and worthy of attention. They need someone to “be like Jesus” to them.
A couple of weeks ago I read a blog post that gave a beautiful example of compassion. Ceil Ryan describes how her friend felt her life was “out of control.” That her friend said, “I feel like I’m drowning… Well. I guess it could be worse.”
“It could be worse.” Instead of agreeing with her, Ceil validated her feelings and struggles as real and she looked past that statement and saw a hurting soul. She writes, “The pain, stress and worry she is feeling is real. She’s sharing so her struggle can be recognized. It calls out to me, begging to be carried, and to be respected as a burden too heavy to carry right now.”
Ceil’s willingness to look past dismissing words personally validated my hurts, too. I have read other posts or comments to mine that also validate my pain (and I thank God for you all), but too often I dismiss it and don’t allow it to instill more compassion towards myself. Sure, I’m learning to open up and write more about my struggles, but I often say to myself “It could be worse. Appreciate that and be thankful for what you have.” In this way I deny my struggles, whether with chronic illness, the lingering triggers of past abuse, emotional pain, loss, and other stress or worry in life. This inhibits me from grieving as I should. And I’m realizing it drives a wedge in my relationship with a loving and compassionate Savior. When I don’t want to admit I hurt to myself because “it could be worse” or “I need to count my blessings,” I continue to carry my own burdens, even though others are willing to bear the burden with me. And sometimes I don’t feel I deserve to be carried. And I get weighted down and don’t share my hurts with Jesus. I don’t feel the driving need to unburden my pain to Him or let Him carry it.
Even though Jesus knows every deep recess of our hearts, He still wants us to admit we hurt and to unload our pain and struggles to Him. To admit we are helpless without Him. With Him, not one thing we suffer is “too little” to be acknowledged and mentioned. His heart is full of compassion for us.
When we have compassion, we put ourselves in someone else’s shoes and really feel for them. What an absolutely perfect example we have in Jesus. He put Himself in our shoes and suffered in our place. And He still does as He watches over each of us, carrying our sorrow and our pain. He sees into our very souls and shares in our tears. He never dismisses our pain. He never says His pain is so much greater than anything we suffer, so we have nothing to complain about. He never says anything we hurt about is “too little” for Him to care about. He hears our buried longings begging to be carried by Him.
Yes, it can always be worse, but this doesn’t mean our pain isn’t real. Wherever we are feeling pain, stress, or heartache, whether physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, financially, etc., it’s worthy of attention. There are people who by God’s grace will show compassion, who are willing to help ease our burdens. Please don’t get discouraged if you cannot find them and if you are getting beaten down again and again. You are worthy of love and compassion. Remember, dear friends… There is one perfect Compassion-Giver Who cares so deeply, will never slight or belittle our concerns, and will never turn us away. He wants us to acknowledge we’re hurting and to freely bring all our burdens to Him. He not only loves to carry our burdens, but He even delights in doing so. And when we have no more strength to go on, He will gently lift us and carry us through.
“Because of Your great compassion
You did not abandon them in the wilderness.
By day the pillar of cloud did not fail
to guide them on their path,
nor the pillar of fire by night
to shine on the way they were to take.”
Nehemiah 9:19“But You, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God,
slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.”
Psalm 86:15Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for His compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is Your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23“When He saw the crowds, He had compassion on them,
because they were harassed and helpless,
like sheep without a shepherd.”
Matthew 9:36“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort.”
2 Corinthians 1:3
“Compassion Hymn”
by Keith and Kristyn Getty
“And with compassion for the hurting You reached out Your hand,
As the lame ran to meet You and the dead breathed again.
You saw behind the eyes of sorrow and shared in our tears;
Heard the sigh of the weary, let the children draw near.”
Thank You, Lord Jesus,
for your unfailing compassion.
Please make us more like You with hearts
full of compassion towards the hurting.
Linking up with:
Holley – Coffee For Your Heart
Jennifer – Tell His Story
Kelly – Cheerleaders of Faith
Freed to Fly 
Trudy, I agree that it can be really hard to offer ourselves the same compassion we try to give to others and which Jesus has already poured out for us. But in the withholding we can find ourselves becoming withdrawn and hurt on the inside, simply because we too need to receive compassion to feel loved and accepted, heard and understood.
Yet Jesus loves us just as much as He loves others. He aches to share our pain and meet us in our distress. And we need to have our eyes opened to Truth and our hearts ready to receive it deep within. May you sense God’s overwhelming love for you, my friend, and allow Him to minister to you as you minister to us here. Let Him carry your burdens, cares and concerns as only He can. You deserve no less, lovely friend. Blessings in abundance to you. Xx ❤
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That’s so true that “we can find ourselves becoming withdrawn and hurt on the inside” when we withhold compassion from ourselves. Thank you for all your loving prayers and caring concern, Joy. May our hearts be prepared to receive our Lord’s compassion deep within! Hugs!
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Hi Trudy! I am so honored that you would write about one of my posts. Thank you for your link too, you are so generous…
Self-compassion and compassion for others in the face of hardship is always a struggle, especially if we make believe everything is okay, or accept that the other will be ok too. I totally agree with your understanding that it goes beyond what we say, right to what we should be doing. Loving.
Thank you so much for making my day!
Ceil
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You’re so welcome, Ceil. I’m so glad you are encouraged. Your post was so inspiring and validating to hurting souls. I thank God for your tender compassion. May God bless you and keep you in His tender loving care! Hugs!
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Giving compassion to ourselves is often the hardest, yes? But we definitely need it too! Discounting our pain doesn’t make it go away; it only goes undercover. Thanks for being honest here, Trudy. May we all learn to be more compassionate toward each others and toward ourselves.
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So true, Lisa. Giving compassion to ourselves is the hardest. Yes, may we all learn to be more compassionate toward others and ourselves. 🙂 Praying right now that God will be with you and give you peace, joy, and strength in Jesus! Hugs!
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Hi Trudy,
Your words are so comforting that Jesus never overlooks our pain or what’s bothering us — quite the opposite – he invites us to bring all our cares to him. I’ve been practicing this of late. Too often I speak or act before even thinking of bringing it to him first. I find when I do, I see another side of him that I hadn’t experienced or expected. To know that he’s waiting to have compassion on us should invite us to extend it to others. So much good truth here today! xo
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I’m so glad you were comforted, Valerie. So true that Jesus never overlooks our pain. Thank you for reminding me of this again. I need to remind myself often and sometimes I long to grasp that truth with my heart, not just my mind. May we both learn more and more to bring our cares to Him first and may we gain more insight into the riches of His compassion and love for us! Hugs!
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Trudy, your post makes me think of the song “Mighty to save”. 🙂
There is so much truth to what you’ve shared here. I think so many people have built up walls to having compassion for others now days. I pray our hearts would soften and we would become more compassionate with others and also with ourselves.
(((HUGS))) to you!
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Hi Krista. I love that song. 🙂 I thought of it here, but I know I’ve mentioned it before. With you, I pray our hearts would soften with compassion for others and ourselves. May we become more and more like Jesus! Hugs to you, too!
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Thank you Trudy, for pointing us to the one who will ALWAYS have compassion on us. I love that verse from Colossians. I used it myself in a blog post recently. 🙂 And don’t you just love Ceil? I do too. Blessings on your weekend, friend.
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Yes, He ALWAYS will. 🙂 I’m so glad you are encouraged by His truth, Betsy. Yes, I do love Ceil. 🙂 She’s a beautiful person who by grace takes the Colossians verse seriously. Blessings on your weekend, too! May the grace of Christ our Savior and the Father’s boundless love with the Holy Spirit’s favor rest upon us from above! Hugs!
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I discovered something powerful over the years – if my hurts are validated (not reasoned out or told why I shouldn’t have them but simply validated) it’s like a pressure release. I feel better and it’s so much easier to move forward! I pray I can remember to validate another’s feelings first. Thank you for sharing this!
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So true, Carrie. Validation is so important and freeing. I, too, pray I remember to validate other’s feelings. Praying Jesus fills you with His love and peace each day! Hugs!
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