Tag: self acceptance

Accepting Yourself As You Are

Trudy Den Hoed18 Comments

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When I took a break from blogging, I wrote down notes and questions to reflect on. I discovered one recurring problem I have is not accepting myself as I am. The deep truth is I don’t see myself through Jesus’ eyes.

I’m realizing how often I’m apologizing to myself or others in my thoughts about who I am or what I do or don’t do. I’m trying to come to grips with believing I have a makeup exactly as God wants, and I need to accept myself just the way I am.

I am an introvert. I think I was always introspective as a child already. I get nervous in crowds. Socializing wears me out, even more so with the weight of chronic illness. I am not a good conversationalist. I feel insecure and often get tongue-tied when it comes to what I really want to say. I don’t think of it until later what I should have asked or said. Afterwards I rehash what I said or didn’t say, over-analyze, and worry that I may have said something wrong. {It’s hard to know what comes from my personality and what resulted from abusive situations. But healing takes time, and at the bottom of it all, I’m still an introvert, and I have to realize that’s ok.}

I beat myself up for not being “better” at socializing. I compare myself with the social butterflies who can so easily talk with people, and I fall short. Why can’t I talk more easily like they can? Why do I always have to feel so nervous? Why won’t the words come?

I sometimes do better one on one, but even then I have to keep reminding myself to “Just be you, and look to Jesus.” And I do believe that when I can see myself through His eyes, I am less stressed. If I can see myself as His beloved the load becomes lighter.

Do you accept yourself as you are? Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert?

Here are some important truths we all need to remind ourselves of, no matter what personality we have:

  1. “I will praise You because I have been remarkably and wonderfully made…” (Psalm 139:14a HCSB) We are marvelously made by God. He created each of us with unique personalities and gave each of us purposes in life that can never be carried out by any other human being. He doesn’t want any of us to act like someone else other than who we are or beat ourselves up for being who we are.
  2. “For your royal husband delights in your beauty; honor Him, for He is your lord.” (Psalm 45:11 NLT) We may think of ourselves as “ugly,” but God only sees us as beautiful. He even delights in us and cherishes us.
  3. “Even before He made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in His eyes.” (Ephesians 1:4 NLT) We already are pre-approved. We don’t have to do anything to make ourselves more special or enough in Jesus’ eyes. Through His grace, we are enough. We are special just to be loved by Him. That love will never ebb or flow according to what we do or don’t do.
  4. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old is passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Cor. 5:17) All our sins, mistakes, and old insecurities can fall away through Christ. He wants us to see ourselves as newly created in Him – accepted, redeemed, and loved unconditionally.
  5. “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.” ( Romans 15:7) Jesus welcomes us, receives us, and accepts us just as we are, no matter what personality we have. He wants us to accept ourselves just as we are. And others just as they are.

“Beautiful”
by MercyMe

May we accept ourselves just as we are
and as marvelously made by God!

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Linking up with: 

Holley – Coffee For Your Heart 

Jennifer – Tell His Story 

Kelly – Cheerleaders of Faith

Bonnie – Faith Barista’s Beloved Brews

Self-Doubt and Self Acceptance

Trudy Den Hoed2 Comments

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Do you ever feel so downhearted you have to cry? You just can’t understand why, because you’re surrounded by daily blessings. You start beating yourself up, because you feel you should be rejoicing. Yet you feel so sad.

Sometimes when we can identify why we are in the pit of gloom, when we can put a name on it, we can start dealing with it. When I received Renee Swope’s blog post – When You Don’t Know What It Is – I read,  “Self-doubt was making me question everything I thought, felt and said.” That’s it! That’s my problem. I’ve been sinking back into that self-doubt again… I second guess myself 24/7. I don’t believe in myself, and I doubt everything I do, think, say, or write. I don’t even trust my own feelings, my deep-down-in-my-gut instinct. The deep-in-my-heart knowing of Truth. Those negative voices from the past are raging a hey-day in my heart, eating away at my confidence in Christ alone.

God counted us worthy enough to create with a special unique purpose. He counted us worthy enough to die in our place. He values us, and He wants us to value ourselves as unique creations with God-given gifts. I was raised with the belief that self-esteem is connected with self-worship and a form of pride, the kind that God opposes (James 4:6), and I know there are Christians today who think “self-esteem” is self-serving, not God-serving. But I believe God created our mental faculties as well, and He created us to be lovable and capable. When humans do and say things to mess up that thinking, I believe Jesus hurts with us.  He doesn’t want us to feel worthless and unlovable. He wants us to accept ourselves as we are and to believe in ourselves as a worthwhile person, regardless of what we can or cannot do, to believe in the gifts He has given us.

Self-Esteem Helps to Hope:

  • Don’t Throw Away Your Confidence – One of my favorite reminders to focus on who I am in Christ is Renee Swope’s free print-out. In three columns, she lists what our self-doubt says, what God says, and a Bible verse to prove the Truth of what God says.
  • Low Self-Esteem, Satan’s Deadliest Weapon – “Low self-esteem is a gut-level feeling of inferiority, inadequacy, and low self-worth. This feeling shackles Christians in spite of wonderful experiences, in spite of their faith and knowledge of God’s word.”
  • Self-Esteem Check: Too Low, Too High or Just Right? – “Self-esteem is your overall opinion of yourself — how you honestly feel about your abilities and limitations. When you have healthy self-esteem, you feel good about yourself and see yourself as deserving the respect of others. When you have low self-esteem, you put little value on your opinions and ideas. You might constantly worry that you aren’t “good enough.” 

 YOU Are Beautiful!