When we want to know Jesus more, when we long for Him to mold us more into His image, Satan works overtime to keep us away from Jesus. He craftily deceives us. He grasps our feet and pulls us away and downward into a deep, black hole where we can see no hope. Without the powerful love of Jesus, there is no way out.
Satan knows our vulnerable spots and uses them to his advantage. I was sexually abused by a minister decades ago, and I have dealt with it and worked through it, but sometimes emotional triggers still fling me back to that place where I felt like a puppet on strings with no voice – where my feelings or wishes didn’t matter. That place where my mind disconnected from my body so I wouldn’t feel. When triggers fling me into the past, shame and fear flood in and suck me down like quicksand. I desperately try to look up to Jesus and grab hold of His powerful hand, but it’s so hard sometimes to lift up my weary head and heart.
But again and again, God has been gracious to lift my heavy head and heart for me. During a conversation with my husband this morning, two truths captured my thoughts:
- Our past may mold our future, but it is God Who created us in His image and He molds us to be more like Him. So we couldn’t be in better hands.
- The pain we endure here on this earth is nothing compared to the glory we will one day experience.
While we wait for that glory, life here on earth won’t always be a picnic, but God has promised: “Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” (Isaiah 46:4) He made us. He will carry us. He will sustain us. He will rescue us. And all the powers of Satan and darkness will never prevail against God Who has all power in His hands.
Often inspirational music uplifts me and gives me hope. In his song – Carry Me – Josh Wilson sings, “Carry me, carry me, carry me now from my sinking sand to Your solid ground. The only way I’m ever gonna make it out is if You carry me, carry me, carry me now…”